So today I walk from my office to my girlfriend’s office picking up the package I saw waiting for her at the front desk (and signing for it). While I was already planning to pick up the package, you should not for later, that she did ask me to pick it up when I said I was coming over.
It’s a slightly-padded legal-size envelope. I didn’t think much of it. As I walk in and hand her the envelope, I tell her what company it’s from and as she takes it from me hand, with a sly smile she goes “oh… that’s actually your Christmas present.” She then rips open a small corner, peaks inside, and closes it and puts it on her desk and gives me the hug I came over for. Unsure if she’s just messing with me, I ask if she’s serious, and she is. I try not to let me mind churn over the possibilities.
I sit down and chat briefly. At one point, I mentioned how tempting it was to have my Christmas present two feet from me. My girlfriend, the evil temptress that she is, actually says “if you want it, you can have it now.” What the hell kind of Christmas spirit is that? Anyway, I use the last bits of strength I have to say no thanks, and I leave. As I step out of her office, she makes some comment about it not being paper (admittedly while I had assumed my gift was not a sheet of paper, this was a small relief), and I turned around and walked back into her office to assure her I would like whatever it was she gives me and as I walk back in the doorway she scrambles to cover up something (obviously my gift) which she apparently laid out on her desk. Silly girl… wait till I get more than 3 steps down the hall! I’ve only forgotten water, sunglasses, or something else in your office 90% of the times I’ve been in there.
Anyway, moving along to my point (yes, I have a point), I came to the conclusion today that knowing the size of your gift sucks – especially if that size is best described by “small.” Because there are many wonderful things that came in very small sizes… oh so many (the larger your gift gets the more distinctive a particular size can be, but with small, it could be oh so many things). And once you have a size, try as you might, your mind will enumerate all of the possibilities it can fathom. Even if you know roughly how much it cost (because your sly girlfriend didn’t mention she already had ordered your gift when you asked what the season’s spending limit should be, thus giving her an upper hand), you will come up with absurdly expensive ideas of great extravagance, medium ideas, small ideas. You will fathom gifts from $.50 to $50,000. And the last thing I want to do is have expectations. That never leads to anything good (it was one of my ex-girlfriend’s many downfalls). So what is a man to do?
Yeah. She totally did this one on purpose…
P.S. Refrain from posting guesses in the comments. I didn’t post the name of the company for a reason. I actually want to be surprised, and I’m fighting every urge I have to look it up so that I can be surprised.
Darling, I do want to point out that I had no intention of telling you it was your Xmas gift when I asked you to pick it up. It was only when you walked in the room and said, “? What did you get from ?” I answered honestly.
And considering you’ve been going on and on and on and on about how you’re researching my gift , asking my friends, spending $16 in parking looking at the gift and so on, I don’t think I’m being unfair.
=P